Why The Bride Cries, Chapter Two - Hand-In-Hand

Wow!

She looks so beautiful! 

I have never seen this woman appear so breath-taking. 

I mean, I thought I had known all the mesmerizing beauty this person had to offer.

I was wrong.  I was so wrong.

Now, right now, in this earth-shaking, diamond shattering, wondrous and glorious moment

I see beauty immeasurable and unending.

Wow!

   There we were.  hand in hand, just steps away from the altar.  In mere moments we would be joined together in holy matrimony, called to be a sacrament to one another for the rest of our lives.  The wait was over.  The day was finally upon us.  The time had at long last arrived.
   Having met in college, I had known my beautiful bride-to-be for five years before our actual wedding day.  Two of those years we spent engaged to one another.  By today's standards we were slow on the uptake in the whole getting married concept by dating for so long and waiting two additional year to tie the actual knot.  Many may wonder why we took so long to get married.  The simple answer is, we needed the time.  Oh, we didn't think we needed it at the time, but in all actuality we most certainly did.  To be honest, I was the one in most need of more time, and if my bride-to-be was truly wanting me in her life she would have to go along for the ride; the most heart-breaking, faith-testing ride of both our lives.
     If it were completely up to me would have gotten married about a year after we first officially met.  It was around that time that my gorgeous new girlfriend was scoping out a university to transfer to for graduate school.  She had been invited to visit a great school in northern California, I mean northern-northern CA.  This university was as northern as it could get without being considered an Oregon school.  My girl need some company for the ride up the state and who better to be that company than this handsome stud right here; me.
   I was excited, very much so.  What more could a guy ask for than a road trip with a beautiful woman?  Just the two of us making the trek across the state.  Can you say adventure and romance? Good, I knew you could.  This was the perfect time to play husband and wife, right?
   Well, the problem was I didn't want to just play at being husband and wife.  I wanted to actually get married on the trip.  Now, that wasn't my original intent when the trip first began.  The actual idea had slowly developed through a recommendation by a professor of ours.  No, she did not straight out suggest we get married in northern CA.  In fact, I'm positive she would have very much been against it.  She did, however, upon realizing my girlfriend and I would be making the very long journey together, recommend several sights to see and great places to eat.  Having grown up in and around the city in which the university was located she most certainly was a wonderful travel guide.  One of the particular locations she highly encouraged us to see was a wondrous state park overlooking the ocean called Patrick's Point.  This happen to be the very sight our professor had been proposed to many years ago.  Now, you are starting to see how the wheels of my young and foolish mind would have started to turn. 
   Many an experienced and wise person recommends taking a long road trip if you truly want to get to know who a person really is.  The nearly ten hour drive to the university gave my girl and I PLENTY of time to get to see sides of each other a normal couple perhaps doesn't have a chance to see until several years of dating, or sadly perhaps even well into their marriage.  The really interesting part of the trip we took was that by the time we arrived at our destination I had actually fallen even deeper in love with my co-pilot, more than I had been before we left town together.  On the trip she proved to be smarter, funnier, and most certainly a whole lot more spiritual that I was at that time.  I loved the way she laughed and made me laugh.  I was enthralled with the way she would become very quiet when she got angry.  She first showed me how she is unable to handle being in the passenger seat for too long.  I discovered then that I would not choose any other person to get lost on an unpaved road with other then her.  In short, I was uncovering important details as to who the person sitting next to me during those long hours on the road was and how I had to have her in my life forever. 
   That trip allowed us an entire four days together.  One day to get to the university, one day to explore it, a day of free play, and a day to get back home.  Of course, if I was to make my move and pop the question it would have to be on the day of free time.  This was to be the day we payed a visit to the infamous Patrick's Point State Park.  I had managed  to convince my witty girlfriend to stop a street fair we happen to see on our way to the park.  It was there that I secretly purchase a ring.  It wasn't your typical engagement ring.  It was made of some kind of stone or mineral, dark silver in appearance.  I wasn't too sure as to it's durability so I bought two, just in case somewhere down the line one happen to break. 
   At long last we found ourselves at Patrick's Point, overlooking the ocean.  We had been told there was a particular wooden railing that held the initials of our professor and her now husband.  Upon unsuccessfully searching for the initials we decided to leave some of our own.  All very much illegal and perhaps even dangerous.  It was then that I ask the love of my life to marry me.  It was as unromantic as it could possibly be.  Keep in mind, I was young and ocward in appearance and mannerisms.  I never got down on one knee, as one day I would.  The entire event was more of a conversation more so that any single question, such as "will you marry me".  I know there was some ocward laughing and I might have even begged at some point during the moment, but other than that I don't remember to much more.  The bottom line, as you may have deduced, was that this gorgeous young lady who wanted me to share in this memorable trip with her said no; she would not marry me. 
   I did present her with the ring and as a sign of our young love for one another she would come to where it, for a short while.  Would you know it, the silly thing broke when she slammed her hand on a table one day.  The second ring I had purchased would meet the same fate. 
   There had to be more than the two of us on that trip to northern CA.  The Holy Spirit must have been guiding our thoughts and our actions.  After we had returned home we knew we would be together for the rest of our lives, we just knew it.  We also knew we were not ready to be married.  I, myself, didn't understand quite may I wasn't ready to be a husband but that personal journey certainly began shortly after our trip.  It was then that I began to get to truly know the faith my beautiful wife-to-be had know all her life.  She was the one who, with loving hands, first opened my eyes to what it meant to be Catholic.  Oh, the stories I could tell of our journey to the altar.  All in due time.
   So, many years later, there we were in front of the altar, hand-in-hand, about to be united as one in the house of our Lord.  She held on to my hands very firmly, as if she would never want to let go, and her eyes were unsuccessfully fighting back tears.  At that moment we both knew this was the right time, this was the right place, and we were the right people.  We turned to face the Monsignor who was to presiding over the liturgy and made our assent up the steps to the kneeler in front of the alter.  My bride looked at me and I look at her, we offered a smile of understanding and gratitude to one another just as the mass began.  And that's when the laughing started.

Blessing,
Michael

Why The Bride Cries, Chapter One - Waiting at the Altar

My heart wouldn't stop racing.

There were so many people there. 

I should have been used to being watched; being on stage; the center of attention. 

I could control the audience; normally. 

What was so different about that day?

I could give a great show; on any other day.

Why was I so giddy?

I couldn't help but smile.

Was that out of character?

Could I really have been so nervous?

I knew exactly what I was getting myself into.

This was what I wanted; wanted my entire life.

I was ready.

Right?

   Looking back I can certainly feel all the excitement of my wedding day.  That was the day I had prayed for most of my life.  It was all happening on that day. 

   Do you find it strange that a male in the twenty-first century would be looking forward to the day he would get married? Sadly, I may perhaps be an exception to the so called "masculinity" that dominate our American society. Where most men today would be feeling as if their independence was quickly coming to an end an overwhelming sense of freedom had awaken me the morning of my wedding and pretty much has stayed with me till this very day so many years later. 

   I saw my beautiful wife-to-be for who she truly was.  She was The One; the one person I could say anything to; the one woman who would know me perhaps better than I would ever know myself.  She was to be my best-friend, my soul mate, my "everything".  If it was positive it applied to her; my wife to be.  What man would see such a person as a weight to burden, a chain to bind him?

   On my wedding day I was overjoyed beyond description, but my emotions were certainly quite evident from the boyish grin on my face; it could not be contained.  This was it, I was ready.  My dad and brothers were by my side the entire morning and I was just waiting for the traditional words of wisdom to come flowing through their mouths.  All I got were smiles, maybe a few nods.  Nonetheless, I knew what the day held in store for me; the start of life long happiness.

   As I stood at the alter waiting for the star of the show to enter and beautifully process down the isle, she to was used to being on stage and knew how to command attention, some thing marvelous happened.  My starlet wife-to-be peeked through one of the small stained glass windows that decorated the chapel doors.  That was so like her to take a quick glace out into the expecting audience just to see if the house was full.  With over Five Hundred people invited to our wedding, YES, the house was full.  By the way, of the five hundred who attended I maybe knew five of them, perhaps six.  However, for that brief moment in which I saw my fiancé in a parade of colors through that small window the attendees disappeared. All of a sudden I broke out in laughter.

   That goofy girl anxiously looking out into the chapel was the only person I wanted to have in my life.  I knew who she was and I loved every bit of her.  My laughter must have seemed as if I had lost my mind; it must have been most certainly unexpected.  My brother beside me also began to laugh, surely to give the appearance of having been in on the joke; pure genius.  His laughter led to the laughter of many more sitting in the chapel.  What happened next was only too predictable.  My wife-to-be just had to take another peek to see what all the fuss was about.  This in turn led to me laughing even harder, which led to even more people laughing even louder.  After a few moments my brother put his hand on my shoulder and asked if I was okay.  His real concern quickly quieted my temporary insanity.  To this day, most people who attended our wedding aren't too sure what exactly was so funny.

   Finally, the chapel doors opened and the pianist began to play.  So many of the people I loved began to slowly make their way down the isle all followed by the most beautiful woman I had ever seen arm-in-arm with my father-in-law-to-be.  My father-in-law bares an amazing resemblance to Tom Sellleck.  He really does.  It's gotten him lots of free coffee throughout his life.  So if you image Magnum P.I. walking down the isle of  a Catholic Church with a gorgeous cherry-blond at his side you pretty much can see what I saw on that magical day. 

   Closer and closer dad-and-wife-to-be inched toward me; larger and large my smile grew.  The moment finally came for me to take my Love's hand, but first I had to shake the hand of the man who would prove to be the pillar of strength in the life of my family in the distant future. (We'll touch on that in another chapter.)  I was expecting a simple, firm hand shake and a smile.  What I got was the grip of a man who was allowing me to take one of his most treasured gifts given to him by God.  This man shook my hand and did not let go until he looked me in the eyes and said, "Take care of her as if your life depended on it".  Up to that point this man had maybe spoken a hand full of words to me; he wasn't a talker.  I actually never took these words as any sort of threat.  There was never any hatred or anger in his eyes.  In fact I took his words just the way he intended me to; as words spoken from faith and experience.  As I was marrying his daughter that day, he and his wife were celebrating their thirty-fifth wedding anniversary.  The man clearly knew what he was talking about when it came to sustaining a long, fruitful marriage.

   To his wise advice, I replied with a brilliant, "Yes, sir", and then took the hand of my lovely finacé.  No matter how hard she may have tried to cover it with her laced vail there was no hiding the obvious; she was crying.

Blessings,

Michael